Wedding Infatuated

If you are planning an outdoor wedding you are most certainly aware of the possibility of rain showers dampening your day. While a rain shower on your wedding is actually considered good luck it is not a lot of fun for you or your guests if you are stuck outside in a downpour. If possible, arrange to hold the wedding indoors in case of rain. While this is not always possible it is good to have a back up plan. Alternatively, ensure that a tent is available to set up on short notice. If a tent is set up and ready to go then the wedding can continue. As a courtesy, offer guests umbrellas to get to and from the tent. Place your ushers in charge of keeping the crowd dry.

Traditionally the bride’s parents always paid for the wedding while the groom’s parents often took care of the rehearsal dinner and sometimes the honeymoon. Now, however, things have changed. Often the couple pays their own way however sometimes parents, grandparents, step parents, and siblings all want to pitch in. Of course having an abundance of resources is always a good thing, however, the problem of who is paying can cause a lot of problems.

If you have several people offering to pitch in it is important that you decide who will pay for what. To do this you should determine first how much each person is willing to chip in. Sure it’s not a pleasant question but, when it comes to wedding planning, it is a necessary evil.

Now that you know that amount you have to work with it is time to draw out a budget. Determine how much each item will cost for the wedding.  

Once you know how much everyone is willing to donate and how much each item will cost, you can then place each person in charge of a certain task. Grandma wants to pitch in $5,000 so let her help you pick out, and pay for, the dress. Mom wants to pitch in $10,000 so let her help you with catering and venue sites. This will make each person feel valued.

If too many people are wishing to help out (as if that were possible) do not forget about the pre-wedding events and honeymoon. These things cost money too.

As long as you are organized your wedding budget can be followed through with few to no fights.

While normally I’m discussing weddings I would like to stray for a moment to promote a writing contest that is near and dear to my heart. Argyle Gifts has announced their first annual writing contest. If any of you brides to be also happen to be authors then this may be a great opportunity for you. Argyle Gifts is giving a $500 grand prize to the best gifts related essay. Since brides are often the recipients of some of the best gifts then this may be perfect for you. Check out this link for more information: Unique Gifts. Runners up will also be featured online. This $500 may be a good supplement to your wedding planning. While it may be a long shot, entering a writing contest can be a legitimate way to increase your cash flow before your big day.

 I hope you consider entering this writing contest and I wish you all the best of luck.  

Whether you are looking for cake designs, makeup tips or centerpiece ideas you are sure to find it all on YouTube. Within seconds of entering YouTube.com you can have hundreds of useful images in your lap all set to snappy music. Here are a few ideas of things to search for to help with many aspects of your wedding:

• Wedding Songs
• Wedding Flower Designs
• Wedding Dance
• Wedding Photography
• Wedding Cakes
• Groom’s Cakes
• Bridal Makeup
• Bridal Hair Tips
• Wedding Dress Advice
• Centerpieces
• Wedding Decorations
• Unique Processionals
• Wedding Vows
• Dance Instruction
• Theme Weddings

… anything else that applies to your event.

 I have found that the instructional videos tend to be the most helpful. While periodicals and internet articles can be somewhat helpful when informing a bride-to-be about the art of making a boutteneire seeing someone go through each step is how most of us will learn the techniques the best.

So next time you’re stuck and searching for ideas and advice hit up YouTube and see what you can find!

If you are planning to hold your wedding on or near a major holiday there may be a few things you should be aware of. For many reasons holding your wedding on a major holiday can be a great thing. One of the largest benefits is the fact that most churches and other wedding venues are already decorated for the holidays. You can save a lot of money on decor. Another benefit is the fact that many venues also offer cut rates near holidays to encourage people to host their holiday parties there. If you shop around carefully you’re bound to find great discounts in many places.

Now the down side. Photographers, florists, caterers, DeeJays and bakers are all working over time this time of year. This means not only will you not get any great deals here but you can also expect to have difficulties finding available vendors. If you are having a holiday wedding be sure to shop around early. 

Another consideration are the guests. Most of your guests will make plans for the holidays a month or two out from the event, especially if they are travelling. For this reason you need to either send “Save the Date” cards as soon as you nail down your date or you need to send out invitations early. Even with this forewarning, however, it is possible that fewer people than expected will show up due to financial stress and time restraints of the guests.

As long as you are aware of the situation beforehand you should be well on your way to having a beautiful holiday wedding that people are sure to remember for years and years to come.

It is well known that public speaking can cause more than a few jitters in a large percentage of the population. For this reason, people are often unnerved by the idea of giving a speech for their wedding. However, there are a few things you can do to cool the nerves.The biggest thing that makes people nervous is the fact that they are ill prepared. There is no reason, however, that your speech must be memorized. If you are afraid of forgetting anything then bring along some index cards. I recommend index cards because if you start to shake it will be less obvious than with a full sheet of paper.

If you feel that no matter how prepared you are you will still be terribly nervous, don’t feel bad about keeping it short. Thank everyone in a short and sweet way and call it good. There is no reason you must go on and on about how lovely the evening is, how great everyone looks, how fabulous your great great aunt twice removed has been treating your brother who she hates. Just say a few short meaningful things and be done with it.

The biggest thing is to remember that everyone at your wedding is a friend or family member. They are not there to judge your public speaking skills they are there to celebrate your wedding day. Don’t address them as you would a large group of strangers, address them as you would a small and personal group of friends.

If you still feel tears well up in your eyes every time you even think about the wedding speech, if you dread the speech more than any other aspect of the wedding, skip it. It may even be a much kinder gesture if you personally thank everyone who came. Circulate through the room and greet all your guests. Thank them for coming and avoid the speech. The wedding speech is certainly not mandatory, it is merely a kind gesture.

The last tip is to have only one spouse speak. Let’s be honest, a long line of speeches is not really fun for anyone. If either you or your spouse is comfortable giving a speech allow that person to speak for both of you. Write the speech together to ensure that everything you both find important is mentioned and have a great time dancing the night away.

One of the most exciting things to do after getting married is opening all the new gifts. Occasionally, however, you’ll receive a gift that is a little… odd. Recently I asked the members of the Yahoo! Answers community what the worst gift they received was. Here are some of the responses I received:

 ”ironing board”

“A faux sculpture of a woman with a clock in the center of it.”

“It’s been 12 years, let me think for a sec.. a check that bounced all the way to the bank. It was his cousin and he didn’t want to say anything to them.”

“We got some really ugly vases. However, we also got about 5 toasters. Duplicate items are a pain.”

 ”a picture of my husband’s granfa”

“A chocolate dildo from a cousin- she said: just in case.”

“We did get used tupperware from one of his aunts. I’d think it was an accident as she was almost blind, but she had called me “backwards” once so I think it might have been intentional. When I say used, I mean used - there were stains and scratch marks on the inside.

“I appreciated the thoughtfulness and love and everyone who gave my wife and I gifts. But after the fifth blender, we were stocked with things to “regift” to other friends getting married.”

 ”Something useless that I had to pay customs on. £50 at a time when we couldn’t afford it.”

“I’m same-sex married, to another woman. I came home from our honeymoon to a book from one of my relatives on ‘overcoming lesbianism.’”

While most gifts you will receive will be, if nothing else, thoughtful; you may also receive one or two that were given only to upset you. In this situation please try to brush it off. However, if you must, get your frustrations out in your “Thank You” note.

“Dear Aunt Beth,

            Thank you for the pre-filled divorce papers and lawyer contact information, they made for great fire starter.

               Love,

                   The Happy Couple

When someone dies within a year or two of your wedding day, the impact can be felt. Weddings are already highly emotional occasions and it’s not uncommon to think about those who we’ve recently lost at this time. When someone very important to the couple dies, it can be a good sentiment to still include that special person in your special day.

One great way to do this is through the music. My grandfather’s favorite song was Ave Maria. Songs like this make for great processional music. You can note the song’s importance in your program. You can also include a little snippet about the person to help everyone understand how integral this person was in your lives. If your loved one’s taste in music was less than appropriate for the ceremony, carry it over to the reception. Make an announcement that you will be dancing with your father to your mother’s favorite song, or whatever the case may be. 

Another way to remember your loved one is through images. You can display a few pictures of the couple with the person you wish to remember surrounding your guest book or gift table. You can also incorporate photos of this person in a slide show if you choose to add that to your reception.

Whatever you choose to do to remember your friend or family member just realize that it will likely be very touching and emotional. There is a psychological effect as well, however. Honoring a person on your big day lets everyone know how important this person was and it can help you let go and move on. If there is someone who was once in your life that regrettably cannot attend your wedding, please don’t leave them out of your wedding.

For some reason weddings can really bring out the worst in people. I read again and again, “My mother in law to be is….”, “I’m not inviting my cousin to the wedding because she…” Disagreements and fights are common during this time but they are not necessary.

Most disagreements I see stem from two basic sources, the stressed out bride and the event of combining two unique families. While you cannot mediate all disagreements that occur between other family members, there are ways to reduce the fights that you yourself may fall victim to.

It’s natural and common to be highly stressed out when you’re planning your wedding. At any given time you have a thousand things running through your mind. You are likely to snap at friends and family for every misstep. You’ll find that most of your acquaintances will be understanding and helpful, however, occasionally you will find someone who would rather argue. You don’t want to remember your big day as a big fight with your sister do you? If at all possible, try to walk away and avoid this instigator until you are completely over the problem.

Another common reason people fight is guest list related problems. Sally, your best friend in college, is fuming that she did not get invited. What she does not realize is that she’s rather loud and embarrassing. If you don’t have the space or budget explain to any left out guests your situation. If you feel it is necessary, there are even cards you can send to uninvited friends to help explain that it is an intimate wedding with a immediate family only. In this situation people understand. If, however, you are concerned that certain people will embarrass you at your wedding, here’s my rule of thumb; if they’re family that your family would like to see at the event and you have the space, invite them. You don’t want a family falling out all over your special day. If they start to act up during your wedding just remember that those are the moments you look back on and laugh about. Friends and other family should be invited at your discretion.

The last type of argument you may get wrapped up in is an argument with a vendor. The florist provided petunias when you specified peonies, the cake is the wrong flavor, the dress still doesn’t fit right after three alterations. In this situation I suggest having a spokesperson. You are likely going to be very emotional when something goes wrong this means you are not likely the best person to handle this situation. Designate someone, Maids of Honor are great for this, who knows your every wish to deal with vendors. Have someone else negotiate discounts and refunds for poor service. Let anyone who’s willing help you to make things right again.

The last thing a bride-to-be needs is the added stress of fighting and bickering. If you remain aware of the potential sources of argument, there is a chance that you can avoid them.

In case you were unaware, I have a little secret for you, most men do not care about 90% of the wedding planning process. There, it’s out, now you know.

When I was planning my big day I could go on and on about the color theme, the cake, the guest list, the budget; my fiance’ lasted about 10 minutes. While it can be terribly frustrating, it’s also very common. I would love to dish out some brilliant ideas to make your fiance seem more interested but that just won’t happen.

Here’s what you have to remember, just because your man could give a hoot as to whether you have a raspberry ganache or cream cheese filling between the layers of the cake, it doesn’t mean that he isn’t excited to marry you. Most guys are envisioning the big picture, that picture containing you and you only, in a beautiful gown, looking like the princess he knows you are.

 That being said, still try to incorporate your fiance’ in the planning process as much as possible. You may be surprised by some of the inspired suggestions he offers up in one of his fleeting moments of interest.